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15 November 2011 @ 02:14 pm
Fic: Three Sheppards  
Title: Three Sheppards (sequel to Talk to Her)
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Character(s)/Pairing(s): John Sheppard/Teyla Emmagan
Word Count: ~500
Age Rating: PG
Challenge(s): h/c bingo: loss of identity
Disclaimer: Sadly, the characters do not belong to me. Just words.
Summary: He doesn't know who he was, or is, anymore.

John felt a sense of relief and anxiety about the whole situation. He was going to be a father, that is if the baby survives. Teyla had grown to the point that it was obvious to everyone in the city that she was expecting. In addition, when people realized the number of visits and the length of them, the backlash on them began.

Granted, it was more on Sheppard than Teyla for the time as she had been relatively protected from a great deal of it after Dr. Beckett insisted on her moving into the infirmary until further notice as she had reached 28 weeks and the fetus was considered viable – although with a great deal of prayer and medical intervention.

As John worked on the training of the men, using Ronon's Satedan experience and knowledge on the Wraith, he struggled with maintaining some sense of command over the people. Especially that of the marines who continued to taunt him in their way.

Each night when he returned to his quarters after a short visit with Teyla, whom most of the time now pretty much slept through most of the discomfort and illness she experienced. He couldn't understand how someone who was so suited for motherhood, would be cursed to the point that the child that she conceived acted like a parasite to her body.

He didn't know what to do with himself. Sure in the early years of marriage with Nancy, he considered children but they were still young, stupid, and too into themselves and their careers that it would have been unfair to bring a child into their lives just then. After they separated, he no longer imagined the possibility. He had his flings and the occasional short term girlfriend who left after she realized he wasn't about to move their relationship further than were it was. He was too chicken to go through that sort of experience again. So he threw himself into every dangerous mission he could get his hands on.

Now here he was. In another galaxy, finding himself becoming emotionally attached to a woman who was native and she was carrying his child. Everything he had ran from on his home world, he found himself in, struggling to keep his head over the water. Struggling to keep from drowning in this level of uncertainty of who he was anymore. Sheppard didn't have the level of respect he had initially – not that it was much even then, what with his own inability to follow a superior's orders. If he couldn't do it, then why should the people under his command?

It was two Sheppards, battling against each other in his mind as the anticipated arrival of his son, or daughter, grew closer. He knew that he had to come to a decision of which man he would be. Or become something he did not yet know. The only comfort he could take in, was that he hoped that Teyla, Ronon, and Rodney – the only people who never questioned or judged him – could help him find who he is.
sexycazzy: John at gatesexycazzy on November 15th, 2011 07:48 pm (UTC)
Aww its good to see some insight into John and his thoughts on what's happening.

And onto to the next story!
kariesuekariesue on November 15th, 2011 10:59 pm (UTC)
Be the man we know you are, John. Do the right thing. You know what it is.

You do like to tease us with these short little (not quite done) fics, don't you?
ssageyssagey on November 16th, 2011 10:13 am (UTC)
john john john..pulls at the heartstrings doesnt he...
and yeah we know who he is and hope he finds himself real soon...